When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanith

When breath becomes air by Paul Kalanith

A NYTimes top seller; Interesting book to chosen to read right after the storied life of AJ Fikry. Both deal with death more than anticipated by me; both deal with living richly and loving abundantly. Both challenging me to live better dealing with my Parkinson's.

'A tureen of tragedy was best allotted  by the spoonful' -when he was in his doctor mode on how to share devastation , most need time to digest, be mindful of how we share

'You can't ever reach perfection, you can believe in an asymptote (a line that continually approaches a given curve but does not meet it at any finite distance.) toward which you are ceaselessly striving'

'Darwin and Nietzsche agreed on one thing : the defining characteristic of the organism is striving'

'The tricky part of illness is that, as you go through it, your values are constantly changing. You try to figure out what matters to you, and then you keep figuring it out. It felt like someone had taken away my credit card and I was having to learn how to budget. You may decide you want to spend your time working as a neurosurgeon, but two months later, you may feel differently. Two months after that, you may want to learn to play the saxophone or devote yourself to the church. Death may be a one-time event, but living with terminal illness is a process.'-WORD

'Seeing death as an imposing visitor but knowing that even  if I'm dying, until I actually die I'm still living'

... The prospect of losing meaning and agency agonizing'

And that my wife and family might say of me as this line in the book - 'even while (the author Paul) terminally Ill he was fully alive despite physical collapse he remained vigorous, open, full of hope, not for an unlikely cure but for days that were full of purpose and meaning'

Footnote 

The song the author and his wife sang. together in church which is not in our hymnal but which I like a lot: the servant song

Will you let me be your servant

Let me be as Christ to you

Pray that I might have the grace

To let you be my servant too

We are pilgrims on the journey

We are brothers on the road

We are here to help each other

Walk the mile and bear the load

I will hold the Christ light for you

In the night time of your fear

I will hold my hand out to you

Speak the the peace you long to hear.

I will weep when you are weeping

When you laugh, I’ll laugh with you

I will share your joy and sorrow

Till we’ve seen this journey through.

When we sing to God in heaven

We shall find such harmony

Born to all we’ve known together

Of Christ’s love and agony